Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Well new neighbors moved in today. I almost broke out in tears when I saw them. It's not them really, they're nice I am sure. It's me. I am so sad that my heart feels so guarded. I don't want to make new friends. I do not want new neighbors. It hurts to make new friends and then for us to be separated. This marks the second summer when my 2 closest neighbors moved. That is the way it is here. I have written before of the transient space in which I live, it's still hard. Lord help me. Help me to be hospitable, open and kind. Help my heart to not fear but trust that You work it all out for good. Help me to realize everything in my life is according to your will, that you know what's going on and You have better plans for me than I could ever imagine. I will trust you.

In other news.... I've been counting my calories this week and well... HOLY COW! Have you ever counted your calories? I have to say, this is my first time! I can tell why my weight has not been where I want it to be these days. With out even trying I consumed around 2100 calories yesterday and today! YIKES! Ok and eating out.. any food.. is CRAZY! I love it so!! But something has got to give! I freaked out when I discovered my favorite McDonald's cheeseburger, the McDouble has like 390 Cals. I mean, it is small! Two Small Patties, they have much larger sandwiches. So sad. In addition to that, Brian and I went to On the Border on Sunday night, on Monday I wanted to count my calories for my 'left overs'. I was greatly disturbed to find out that my meal was around 1900 Calories. That is enough for a whole day! Oh man! I have to get on top of this, it is crazy and I will not become chubby bunny just because I am ignorant of how may calories are in my cheeseburger.

Lucky for me, my husband and I started working out together this week. YAY! I love working out with him. It makes me want to do better when he's there and let's be honest, it is a bummer to work out alone. So thank you Beloved for working out with me, I am so glad to have you jumping around on the mat next to me!

This blog is quite random I know, but I have been looking at many blogs lately, and they are so inspiring. I want to blog more, so this is a start. I want my blog to become something to me, but I'm not sure yet, so in the mean time, here are my meanderings.

One last note. I have an account on Grooveshark. It is awesome. It's an online music site. One thing that I have been LOVING lately is listening to whole albums. When was the last time you listened to a whole album. Instead of just playing the radio, your Ipod on shuffle or a little Pandora, why don't you try listening to a whole album. It's great because there are so many songs that aren't on the radio. Try it out. Heck, try out a new artist, you never know what you'll love next. Right now I'm listening to The ArchAndroid album by Janelle Monae, last night it was Ohmega Watts and this morning Lanae Hale. May you find music that makes your heart happy.


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