the more twangy the better!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

I just LOVE country music. I'm sorry, but I do! I suppose it started with my parentals! They've ruined me, or maybe not ruined, but it's all their fault. They played country music all the time, well I should say they play country music all the time. I know a lot of people grew up with oldies and soft rock, but I grew up with old country and ksop!
I didn't always love Patsy Cline and Don Williams, but when it came around to when I was purchasing my own cd's I bought a cd of each of them. And I often reminisce of long car rides with the Bar J Boys playing on tape. We all had the words to every song memorized, even the yodeling part.
I don't know what it is about Country music and mornings, but they go together like pb&j. Seriously! I get so happy listening to country music in the morning. I have 3 pandora stations that play country, and 2 presets in my car that play it also. It makes my heart glad to listen to it. I love it, I feel like there is substance to it.

I think I especially love Bluegrass-ish country music. Its so twangy and nice! I love songs about little country towns and growin up in the sticks. I don't feel like I grew up too far out there, but I know what it's like to live in the country, and to have neighbors who drive tractors for a living. I lOVE it!
I discovered a new duo this week! a husband and wife, :) they're too cute! the husband always wears overalls and the wife wears snap up country shirts tucked into her highrise jeans. :) it makes me so happy to watch them. Joey and Rory are their names. I love their song "play the song" and "cheater cheater"! :) he he he!

Anyways, I know, I'm just rambling on and on about country music, but I can't help it. I love it! :) it makes me want to drink a beer, make love to my husband, have a bunch of kids and live out in the sticks. :) Music people, its moving!

PS. the sun is out right now. :) IT"S BEAUTIFUL! YAY! Praise God for letting the sun come out!

sweet salvation

Thursday, November 5, 2009

lists lists lists. I love lists. I am good at lists. I can make a list, do the things, check it off. Done! Accomplished! SUCCESS! I am awesome! right?

I love making grocery lists, chore lists, lists of prayers, lists of food, friends, anything! Write a list, it'll get done! I even make lists of doing good.

__ Be nice to others
__ Pray
__ Go to Church
__ Follow Jesus
__ Do the right things
__ Volunteer
__ Serve others
__ ETC.....

What is this list for? This is the list that a lot of people live by. Not exactly this list, I didn't copy it from some guide book to life... it's the list of what we should do. right? It's like how to get to heaven 101.... these are the things to do. This is how I have lived so often. In the Mormon church, and out of it.

What a flawed person I am.

What a flawed belief this is.

The whole point of Jesus dying is because I can't do this list. It doesn't matter where I go, what I do, the things I check off will never get me into heaven. I'm not perfect. I will not be perfect in this life.

Brian has been writing a paper that has harshly reminded me of the path to perfection which I've tried so hard to give up. It's like a drug. I understand why people think this way, I think this way!
Does that make it truth?
No.

Oh how my heart aches to scream it! STOP RUNNING! You cannot be perfect.
You don't Have to!

I don't have to.
Oh sweet salvation, how have you won my heart, and yet it keeps on straying.
Please Sweet Salvation, hang on to my heart, because I can not, but you can. and you do.
It is you who sought me. You who pulled me close. You who holds me dear.
And it's despite my failure I fear.

I love you Sweet Salvation; Jesus! my God!

beauty to bread

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Seriously.. Portland .. Stop Wetting! For those of you not in the Northwest, let me tell you what wetting is. You may know of rain, it falls from clouds, it gets things wet, it makes things grow (along with the sun). What I like to call wetting is not really like rain, it is like one of those misters at the fair that you stand under to cool off. It doesn't seem to fall or rise, just wet the air. Only this is not a hot day, the sun is nowhere to be found, it is cold, and dark... It is my least favorite kind of day, and it is the kind of day that the winter in the Northwest is filled with. But I am supposed to be filled with joy, for Jesus lives inside of me. And I have to say, that even though I feel so lethargic every time it starts wetting, there is still joy. As I walked home from the post office just now I was singing! ! Singing?! I know, it's wetting on me and yet I sing. And I was wearing flip flops, just to reminisce warmth, but as I looked down at my feet I thought, "I love those yellow leaves!" And I do. And now, as I look out the window behind the computer screen, I love those red leaves! I really love the red ones. And seriously, the bush that is outside my window is misted, like the vegetables in the grocery store, but seriously the water is just clinging on for dear life, it is spectacular!




ok, so I think what it is, is that I Love Color! I love the fall, or so I've always said, and you want to know why? Because of the color of course! I mean look, in one picture you get red, green, yellow, orange, purple.

GOD, You are SO GLORIOUS!

Jesus Is the only reason there is joy in my heart today, He is the only reason their is beauty to revel in. I mean, only He could shake the clouds off of my mind and fill it with wonder of him and his creation. I am so glad for the fall, for the colors in fall. They are so awesome!


I have been putting off writing my blog for a few too many days, I've been in a bit of a slump, what with the wetness beginning. And maybe I'm trying to compensate for my lack of interesting things to say with interesting pictures, but the truth is maybe I do have something interesting to say, and maybe my pictures aren't that great.

What I do have to say is that Jesus amazes me. As I read today in John 6 my heart beat fast with excitement and awe. Jesus miraculously feeds 5000, then they seek him, and he tells them, You're seeking me because you ate and were filled. Then he tells them the bread from the father is the true bread from heaven, and it's this bread who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world! But no, he doesn't stop there and let them try to figure out what he's saying, he tells them next, I AM THE BREAD OF LIFE! He tells them 3 times, he tells them they must eat of this bread to live. They must accept HIM as the Bread! From God! Then about all of them get offended and leave, and then he asks the 12 if they are offended by this, (knowing they are surprised by his sayings). He does not say, "Do all these works and be perfect, and then you can live" NO! he says, Partake of ME! This IS a hard saying! What does it mean? He says that The words he Speaks are Life! He gives his life for the world! He is the bread of life! the Substance of life! Jesus is the God-Man sent down to die, to be betrayed and walked away from, to become a SACRIFICE! Given so we can LIVE! HE GIVES LIFE! it is him. Eat this bread and live forever.

Pipe and Passion

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Yesterday while standing in a line in downtown Portland a man walked by; I imagine he was headed home from the work day. He caught my eye because he was smoking a pipe, it was cold, and altough I don't smoke I thought "wow, how comforting that looks in this cold weather." It's not often you see a man smoking a pipe, especially not one wearing converse sneakers and ipod earbuds. Now you probably can see why he caught my eye. I smiled. He was charming in a Portland-Postmodern-do what I like- sort of way. Some of you know that I don't particularly love this city. It is crazy, cold, and concrete and it's just not my favorite place; But I do like watching people, and This city, is one of the best cities for that. The downtown streets are always flooded with a mix of homeless people begging for money, business people moving between public transportation, street preachers, gay activists, families, tourists, and all kinds of different people. It truly is a melting pot city. One thing we all have in common though, we are all people. We were all created by God. He alone sees the true beauty in each one.

This morning while getting ready I looked down into an open drawer in my bathroom and saw a tag that said "Made with Passion". It was a household item, nothing special or significant about it, but when I read that today I thought "God made Me with Passion!" And the truth is; He made all of us with Passion. With Love and Joy and Purpose. He didn't just make us to throw us onto this broken world and test us to see if we could follow him. No! He Made us to proclaim His glory. To show his mercy, his righteousness, his love and forgiveness.

I am truly Blessed that Jesus has sought me and bought me and I hope that he continues to open my eyes to the Beauty and Passion of his creation!

The Transient

Thursday, October 8, 2009

So I have a semi-new neighbor (no pun intended:which you would only get if you are her, or Brian, but still...) and we have become friends quite easily. We are both around the house a lot of the day, we both love to cook, and are passionate about our husbands. We get along very easily, and I've been so glad she moved in. Yet there is a part of me, a part that says I live in this transient place and in this transient time of life, so I therefore must not become good friends with her. It is tragic! Here we are at this strange place in life, between high school/college/single life and married/career/family life. It is an awesome place to be, don't get me wrong; but it creates in me this sort of guard. It's almost as if something inside of me is saying, "don't become friends here, don't let down your guard, don't let these people really know you" and yet I have spent the entirety of a year groaping around this space for some real good friends. And now, I believe God is giving me one, and as stupid as it sounds, I'm a bit scared. Scared that we'll become good friends and then we won't see each other for like 20 years! I know this is lame. What's so bad about that? Nothing I guess, except for all but one of my close friends live far away from me, or I mean I live far from them and it's kinda hard to keep up friendships over distance. (and yet, it is worth it, and I know that my friends that I have kept over the distance are my true friends) Over all I must say that I am excited, and greatful for my new friend... I suppose all of this is coming up, because the friend I made last year, or at least the one that I have become closest friends with, is moving in December. I am so happy for her and her family, they've been here, living at this college for a long time, so I am happy for them... and I am sad for me. But you know, that's just the thing here, they come and go, and I'm no different. Even now I look forward to the day when we can move somewhere else. Where we can desert what has now become our stomping ground here, and move on, to another transient space; in hope that we will be one step closer to being settled....planted....Home.

ok ok..

Friday, September 25, 2009

Alright, so here's the thing about me having a blog. I have this crazy desire/ something that makes me always want to write something really profound in a blog. I want to be awesome and inspiring. It really is a downfall for me. Because most people aren't going to read my blog for something profound, they are just (maybe) interested in me and my life. They don't have the expectation that I'm going to say anything earth-shattering; but I do. Therefore, that is the reason that it's been like a week between blogs. I am sorry to say, I have nothing profound to say.

I do however, have something to say; so I will stop thinking of the next earth-shattering catch phrase, and just say what I have to say. Mostly that I love life, especially the little things.

So it has been our birthday week this week.. and by we I mean Brian and I. We started the celebration with a gift opening on Sunday night. I gave him a new Starbucks Coffee mug, and he gave me the new dan brown book. as for the book, it's awesome. I've only read like 8 chapters, because I am afraid of not being able to stop reading it once I start.. because already it is good. Brian loves his mug. It was just what he needed!
On Tuesday night we celebrated my birthday with dinner at Acapulco.. we flew all the way there.. hahah just kidding, we went to mexican food! It was delicious.. as always. Brian then gave me some gifts. I got a Tea canister which matches some of the others I have. and As you may see, An awesome coffee mug! I was thinking after I bought his, this is awesome, I could really use a new mug too, and much to my suprise and luck.. (or Brian's awesome husband skills) I recieved a totally awesome one!

I really like it! I also got the jacket I'm wearing in the pic, and a new long sleeve t-shirt! Thanks husband!

On Wed. I had a tea party with some of the girl neighbors, it was a fun time and I'm luck to have friends that live so close!

Brian's birthday was so fun! He had requested dinner at home. I made home-made marinara, for spaghetti. It slow cooked all afternoon, filling the house with a wonderful warm Italian smell. I also made home-made breadsticks.(first time) and they turned out great! it was delicious! We also had a ceasar salad. Everything turned out wonderful. But what was even better was that my husband absolutely loved it! I dressed up and made everything nice. It was a great dinner. I also made a round cake and displayed it ever so nicely on my cake stand. I gave him some shirts, a new chess board, a box of sees chocolate and a carmel apple! He was very happy!

I have really enjoyed this week. I have a wonderful husband that I'm so blessed to have. Forget that I've said lucky a whole bunch of times in this post... what I really am is BLESSED! God is so gracious, he is truly a God of renewal. For he makes all things new. He has blessed me with a good home, a great husband, beautiful weather, great jobs, great family, enough money to pay our bills, great friends, great health, a great church family and so much more! As I look back from last year and forward into this year all I can see or say is that I am so thankful to Jesus for bringing me here. For allowing me all of these blessings! I am awed by the glory of God!

He has truly redeemed me! In him alone I stand. and I am safe.

Lord thank you for this blessed year, I pray you will bless the next one, and all the ones you see fit to give me after that. I pray you'll bless me and Brian. I pray you'll strengthen our marriage and our relationship with you. I pray you'll continue to help us out of debt, and to do good work at our jobs. I pray that you'll help Brian get though this semester and school year. And that you'll guide us in each decision that we make. I pray that you'll help me to continually see how blessed I am in you and that I will continue to love the little things in life! I love you LORD! love me...

beauty

Thursday, September 17, 2009

I often talk about God's beauty. I will tell my friends I think God is beautiful, I post it on my facebook, and send it in a text. Sometimes I wonder what people think when I say God is beautiful, I wonder what other people mean when they say it. For me, it really depends on the day. A lot of days God's beauty is the sun peeking out from the clouds, releasing in me a joy that hides with the sun. Other days it's waking up next to my sleepy husband. It's flowers, it's people, it's freshly vacuumed carpet... its the foam on top of my coffee that has a heart pattern in it. So as you can see, it can be practically anything, it just depends on the day, and what God shows me is His beauty that day. A few days ago I was walking home from the mail box, disappointed that there was no mail (I love getting mail, especially packages!) when I walked by this 'grove' of mushrooms!

NOW, For most people, Mushrooms are a nuisance. They are a fungus. Gross. And I would agree in most cases. I won't eat them. They stink. They're like mold.. eww.. BUT, and this is how crazy God is, to me, this day, They were BEAUTIFUL! Ok, some of you from Utah may get this, because we come from the Desert. We don't have mushrooms or moss growing all the way around trees or slugs! So living here, in this wet-land, I often find beauty and awesome-ness in the everyday things. I mean, if mushrooms are growing in your lawn, you would probably be mad. You would pick them out, or kill them or whatever. And yet here I am, wondering at the beauty of them!?! Taking Pictures of them. Basically what I'm trying to say is, These are awesome! No human planted them there, no person watered them, or nurtures them, but here they are... growing. Yes, maybe a weed, or a pest, but that's not the point. The point is, God plants them, He plants this whole earth. He waters it, he gives it sunshine. He cares for the desert flowers and the moss on the tree. We have our gardens and our flowerbeds which we try to water and grow, but God has the whole earth. You can go out to the mountain, and there is a Forest of lush trees, grasses, bushes, flowers! Animals! Oh my goodness. . . How mighty is the LORD? How great is He who watches after the squirrels and the bears, who waters the daisies and the pine trees?

God is beauty, it surrounds us daily. He surrounds us daily. He is always revealing himself to us. The earth proclaims it, the skies pour out revelation of Him. From the mighty universe, to tiny little mushrooms. . . God is everywhere, He created it all. And He is Glorious! And Mighty And Beautiful beyond all measure!



"Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?... Who enclosed the sea with doors when, bursting forth, it went out from the womb...Where is the way to the dwelling of light...Have you entered the storehouses of the snow... can you lift up your voice to the clouds, so that an abundance of water will cover you...can you hunt the prey for the lion or satisfy the appetite of the young lions... do you know the time the mountain goats give birth... do you observe the calving of the deer... is it by your understanding that the hawk soars?..." from Job 38-41

Pictures from Retreat

Monday, September 14, 2009

It's Back

Sunday, September 6, 2009

On Monday, Brian began school again, and I started in on my new year long adventure of being the Youth Director at Parklane. All week long I've been wandering around doing what we(we being Brian and I) like to call "wifey things". In the mornings I wake up and get breakfast, in the afternoon I spend time with God, and reading, in the early evening I make dinner. I'm able to care for my house and my husband, it's wonderful! I've also been gearing up for my new job by reading books, and visiting the office and Youth Group on Wed. I am excited to see what God will do for me, and us in this time of change and growth.

On Friday I made a meatloaf. People think you can add whatever you want to a meatloaf; the truth is that is not the truth! I mean I'm sure everyone thinks they make the best meatloaf ever, but for some reason I think mine is the best. Probably because I don't add Mustard or Oatmeal, these are two ingredients that should never be added to a meatloaf. Anyways, as always the meatloaf was awesome. I have to say, I do love to cook. When we first got married I thought i would like to cook dinner for my husband, but I love to cook. It is quickly become my favorite hobby. I feel like I'm definately getting the hang of somethings in the kitchen and it is great. For instance, I made homemade biscuts for biscuts and gravy today, they were delicious. It is so joyful to make something and have it taste good. It's like the kind of art I'm good at!

As for what is back, well it's the rain. I suppose the summer is over now, being since today is the second day in a row that it is raining. I hope it clears up though because I am not quite ready for the fall. I'm not quite ready for jackets and scarfs, and I'm definately not ready for miserably cloudy days. And although I whine and cry about the rain, Jesus still is a Good God, for even now as I write about the rain the sun comes out and floods my apartment, reminding me that I am loved.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

The Oregon Coast: People say it's awesome, and I would agree... Mostly. When the sun does come out, which is very rarely, and when it's warm, which is not hardly ever I suppose it's probably awesome to hang out there. But I do have to say, that even when it's cold, and wet, and cloudy and grey, which is the majority of the time, It is beautiful. It's not like the beach at San Diego, and I don't crave the Oregon Coast, but the waves are big, and the sound is beautiful. The pelicans take sweeping glides back and forth where the waves crash against the sand. The water running from a small fall creates a multi-colored pattern in the sand which is polka dotted with seashells and seaweed. Even as I shivered I was amazed at God's beauty and majesty. He is the amazing Creator of all, and HE is Amazing.

At first

Friday, August 28, 2009

Pick a font... they all look the same. Oh well. Here I am, at first blog. Who knows what one says to the world, (or at least their friends) except for Hello. I'm starting a blog because we are starting a new time in life. No more school for me, now into the workforce. . . or better yet, the Ministry. I am going with the high-schoolers this weekend, to the Coast. I hope it doesn't rain, because me and Brian are sleeping in a tent, but then again it probably will, because it is Oregon. In fact i think it might rain here, very shortly. Oh well. I named this blog Sweeter than Honey... more to come on that later, but for now, it's Jesus; just know that.